Day 14271

When I started this blog, one of my goals was to be completely honest with myself and others. I wanted to stand naked, unembarrassed by the true me. Well, the true me likes ice cream. My favorite is vanilla ice cream with peaches. Sounds simple, but it's actually loaded with complex overtones and is oh-so-yummy. It has been far too long since I last tasted this heavenly flavor.

Lately, I've been hanging out at a kind of virtual Baskin-Robbins. Yeah, that's right, a place with 31 different flavors for one to sample! It sounds exciting and, if I'm honest, on the surface, it has been. However, I am finding that, though the other flavors are sweet, all of this variety just doesn't excite me like I thought it would. In fact, I feel kind of empty afterwards. The initial sense of excitement from having these 31 different flavors want to touch my taste buds has worn off. I actually regret having sampled the few of these I have tasted. Till the day I die, I know I will always want my peach! I also know I'm scared to say it out loud. Not because I don't believe it, but because I know it is true and that my level of desire might not be recipricated.

I need to say it though. Gaäd, I should be mature enough to be able to be honest with myself and my sweet peach! I need to put it out there to see if the nectar I desire wants to be eaten as much as I want to eat it. I can only hope that stating my physical, spirital, and emotional hunger for the ice cream won't frighten it off.

How does one say this, when there has been so little recent contact between us? Will I be believed when I say that peach is still my favorite and that I can't see myself eating another? Will I be able to abstain from sampling those other flavors? I certainly want to be strong enough to do this. I need to be. I just don't think I can live without my peach ice cream. And I need to take this risk if I am ever going to be true to myself and fully experience this tasty treat.