Day 14490

So my beloved picked me for this after she got tagged by NewWaveGurly who picked this up from Brian! For the record, just let me say that I know I am so screwed by the timing of this! We'll have to see if I can find anyone to respond!

10 Years Ago Today
I was living in Klamath Falls, OR working as a weatherman and growing incredibly good-tasting strawberries.

5 Years Ago
I was nervously awaiting the results of a government bid to run the weather station I worked at 5 years before.

1 Year Ago
I was in ND on vacation re-visiting family, friends, and childhood memories.


Yesterday
I was late for a chiropracter's appointment.


Tomorrow
After work, I drive north with my first load of boxes to deliver to Michelle. We are so gonna be hurtin' for space!


5 Snacks I enjoy
* Ice cream
* Pudding
* Fresh fruit
* Cheesecake
* Beer

5 Bands That I Know The Lyrics to Most of Their Songs
* Grant Lee Buffalo
* Baby Newt
* Ultra Vivid Scene
* Leftover Salmon
* moe.

5 Things I Would Do With $100,000,000
* Buy land and build a home
* Invest for future
* Travel the world
* Help my mom out with medical expenses
* Help out a select few friends

5 Locations I'd Like To Run Away To
* Tasmania
* New Zealand
* Italy
* Oregon
* New Mexico

5 Habits I Have
* RadioParadise.com
* Blogging
* Daydreaming
* Staying up way too late
* Procrastinating

5 Things I Like Doing
* Fishing
* Camping/hiking
* Seeing live bands
* Getting frisky
* Traveling

5 Things I Would Never Wear
* Genital jewelry
* White after 5:00 PM
* A bra
* A rosary
* Leather pants

5 TV Shows I Like
* Family Guy
* That 70's Show
* Austin City Limits
* Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
* American Chopper

5 Movies I Like
* The Princess Bride
* American Beauty
* Wag The Dog
* Dogma
* Thunderheart

5 Famous People I'd Like To Meet
* Trey Anastasio
* Jeff Tweedy
* Bill Moyers
* Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
* Jon Brion

5 Biggest Joys At The Moment
* BluEyes
* Change
* RadioParadise.com
* Dreams of driving my Honda
* Water


5 Favorite Toys
* My computer
* My multitrack
* My fishing tackle
* My Honda
* Dancin' Jimmy

5 Tag Teamers
* Joseph (Cuz I'm curious to see if he is willing to post something this light.)
* Peter (Cuz he could probably use something this light.)
* The Cheesemistress (Cuz she might say, "Fuck fuck fuckity fuck".)
* Dave Berry (Cuz someone has to invite him into our circle.)
* Adam (Cuz it has been far too long since I contacted him. Apologies, sir.)

Day 14486

I meant to write something completely different tonight, but after a few moments of spontaneous dozing and realizing that too many of those close to me were dealt a significant blow recently, I decided something light was in order. Tomorrow, expect the opposite.

So, without further delay, another meme. This one I siphoned from the the gas tank of the incredibly funny Jason, who, rumor has it, sold his beautiful but stressed wife's soul to Cherry for it!

PERSONAL

1. Nervous habits?
I chew the tough skin around my nails. Thanks, mom.
2. Are you double jointed?
Not without some painful side-effects.
3. Can you roll your tongue?
Like this?
4. Can you raise one eyebrow at a time?
Of course I can! I regularly use this skill while interviewing perspective job applicants!
5. Can you blow spit bubbles?
Out of my nose? Why yes! It's an extremely useful skill to assist one in picking up women in bars.
6. Can you cross your eyes?
Who told you? Oh, my mistake...I thought it said "cross-dress".
7. Tattoos?
Yes. Scar/tattoo - it's all the same to me.
8. Piercings?
No. Not plural.
9. Do you make your bed daily?
Not since junior high, when the hormones were a-raging.

CLOTHES

10. Which shoe goes on first?
The first one I see through my sleepy, crusty eyes.
11. Speaking of shoes, have you ever thrown one at anyone?
Yes. It was a dark and stormy night, er, morning, and I used a combat boot accurately aimed at some foolish Staff Sargeant, who thought he should rouse me from my slumber after I had just worked a mid shift at Osan AB, ROK. I pretended to not know what I had done.
12. On the average, how much money do you carry?
I always try to have at least 4 pennies in my pocket and a Canadian quarter, just in case.
13. What jewelry do you wear 24/7?
Just my lucky cock ring.
14. Favorite piece of clothing?
Birthday suit.

FOOD

15. Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it?
I don't know about twirl...maybe spin it a little.
16. Have you ever eaten Spam?
Well, I will admit to having had it in my mouth, but I swear I did not swallow!
17. Do you use extra salt on your food?
Nope. Salt is the root of all evil.
18. How many cereals in your cabinet?
None. I finished off the granola with cranberries earlier tonight.
19. What's your favorite beverage?
Rogue Brewery's Hazelnut Brown. Remember that come Christmas time!
20. What's your favorite fast food restaurant?
That awesome Hawaiian BBQ in Pasadena, CA. Don't remember it's name.
21. Do you cook?
Only in small batches, then, when I sense that the fuzz might be getting suspicious, I move onto another meth lab, er, apartment.

GROOMING

22. How often do you brush your teeth?
Up and down or side to side?
23. Hair drying method?
I shave down there, so not an issue.
24. Have you ever colored/highlighted your hair?
Only inadvertantly. I was actually using the magic marker to indicate inches.

MANNERS

25. Do you swear?
Not on my life, just yours.
26. Do you ever spit?
Actually, I swallow. Wait. No. It was only in my mouth! See #16 above.

FAVORITE

27. Animal?
None. Everything tastes like kitten to me.
28. Food?
Whatcha got?
29. Month?
August. I feel sorry for it `cause it has no holidays.
30. Day?
Saturday.
31. Cartoon?
Family Guy. No contest.
32. Shoe brand?
None. The hot iron tends to burn my feet.
33. Subject in school?
When the class first started, I thought it would be Sex Ed. It wasn't what I thought.
34. Color?
Green, like M & M's, `cause, you know, I'm a perv.
35. Sport?
Baseball. See #34 above.
36. TV shows?
Anything with exposed nipples.
37. Thing to do in the spring?
Fish.
38. Thing to do in the summer?
Fish and expose nipples.
39. Thing to do in the autumn?
Fish and expose perkier nipples.
40. Thing to do in the winter?
Sleep, dreaming about exposed nipples.

IN AND AROUND

41. In the CD player?
Heatmiser - "Mic City Sons".
42. Person you talk most on the phone with?
(916)-767-8900
43. Reading?
Palms.
44. Do you regularly check yourself out in store windows/mirrors?
Just the mirrors. They're 2-way you know. I just know someone is on the other side, so I like to try to disgust them as much as I can.
45. What color is your bedroom?
Under a black light, it glows. I don't know what that means.
46. Do you use an alarm clock?
Use and abuse.
47. Window seat or aisle?
Window seat. I like to look for ants.

DUMB

48. What's your sleeping position?
Fetal, whimpering.
49. Even in hot weather do you use a blanket?
Just a sheet. I'm modest if nothing else...(naked).
50. Do you snore?
Yes, when I am drunk or very tired.
51. Do you sleepwalk?
I don't even exercise when I'm awake. Do you really think I'll do it while I'm sleeping? Dumbass!
52. Do you talk in your sleep?
I recite the speech Tom Cruise gave me, when he managed to recruit me to the dark side.
53. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
Well, you gotta remove some of the stuffing first, but...What was the question?
54. How about with the light on?
I make shadow puppets.
55. Do you fall asleep with the TV or radio on?
Yes.
56. Last interesting person you met?
The Boognish. Don't fear. Mr. Cruise had warned me about him.

Day 14482

Good evening, fellow pill poppers! Seems the last day I posted, I had intended to have a part "b". I don't exactly remember why I didn't post part "b", just that I didn't. So be it. It must not have been that critical/important/interesting. Anyway...Here's a real post...

I heard two really good quotes today, one by a gentleman I interviewed for a job, the other on PBS. The interviewee responded to a line of questioning by stating, "Every individual who walks through that door, or even into your life, is another opportunity to do or experience something. That something is... life."

Cool, huh? It just reeks of optomism. I loved the answer. I loved the enthusiasm. I loved the outlook. What can I say, he had me at "Hello!" That spirit/zest/philosophy is so exciting/contagious/necessary. I must admit to having a strong curious desire to find out whether he does more than just talk the talk. He certainly is qualified for the position, but I'm still in the middle of interviewing...can't jump too far ahead of the process/my duty/myself.

--- It appears I'm slash-happy tonight...must be the pills! P.A.I.N.K.I.L.L.E.R.S. for the pain in my back. Earlier today, I had some heat therapy and some "special" cartlidge-busting treatment. The special part was where he put his body weight behind the pressure of his thumbs. Anyway, the net result at this point is that I'm in serious pain... Supposedly, I will have more movement and flexibility in my spine after a few more of these "treatments". "Side-effects may include, but are not limited to, drowsiness, nausea, sexual side-effects, and diarrhea." ---

*Returns to "No Whining Zone"*

Where was I? Right...the quotes. The second one came from some mother/daughter relationship wannabee infomercial, er, seminar, on PBS. The lady conducting the seminar said, "Your emotions are not a result of the past, but instead are a direct result of the choices you make in the present. In other words, if you feel bad or angry or happy or whatever, it is because you chose to do so."

This quote stuck with me, lingering, kind of like a fart under the covers. I don't think I have a strained relationship with my mother at all, but the thought of my dad tends to induce feelings of anger. It's fair to say that I even enjoy feeling the hatred toward my father, an obvious choice! It's also fair to say the lady's words sent me into a feeling vaguely resembling guilt. Apparantly, I choose to hate my dad. I'll swallow hard while I continue to figure out why I don't have a good relationship with him...

Crap! It was a lot easier to believe that I was a total victim and that my dad was the foolish asshat. So, I have been choosing my feelings towards him. "Smile and the whole world smiles with you!" So far I haven't sufficiently pepped myself up to offer up any sort of olive branch . Feels like that is another choice I'm making in the here and now.

Exhausted. Head should hurt, but doesn't...must be the pills. Well, I guess I should trust gravity to put me into bed...Good night, y'all!

Day 14476a

Greetings from mostly dark Pasadena, CA! I am still on vacation, hence the lack of posts over the last several days, but found this little gem of a quiz over at the cheese stands alone. Thought I'd share it with you until I can get back home and tell you more about my wonderful life!

the Cutting Edge (56% dark, 43% spontaneous, 27% vulgar)

your humor style: CLEAN | SPONTANEOUS | DARK Your humor's mostly innocent and off-the-cuff, but somehow there's something slightly menacing about you. Part of your humor is making people a little uncomfortable, even if the things you say aren't in and of themselves confrontational. You probably have a very dry delivery, or are seriously over-the-top. Your type is the most likely to appreciate a good insult and/or broken bone and/or very very fat person dancing. PEOPLE LIKE YOU: David Letterman - John Belushi

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 84% on dark You scored higher than 0% on spontaneous You scored higher than 38% on vulgar

Link: The 3 Variable Funny Test written by jason_bateman on Ok Cupid

That's right...I'm just like John Belushi! Take notes!